Weekend

So you come to a point in your life where you realize that your time is not your own and your decisions are no longer your own. I think I really hit this point this weekend. I spent my weekend going to the in-laws, doing laundry, cleaning up, assembling a rocking chair and a shelving unit. My wife was working all weekend so she was either at work or sleeping while I was doing most of this.

I did go to the golf shop and look at new golf clubs; this usually would have ended up with me getting new golf clubs because its been a really long time and I could really use new ones. The whole time I was looking at them I was thinking of all the other things I could do with that money, especially with a new baby on the way. I think its just a total mindset change. As much as I would love to get my new clubs I just can't justify it. I know my mom passed up a lot of things when I was growing up so that she could look after the things I "needed." I hope I can do as good of a job as she did.

Its not just at home. Even at work. The way I talk and the decisions I make impact lots of things. I want my attitude, my speech and everything I do to glorify God. I want people to see something different in me.

I found myself getting frustrated this weekend after several nights of not sleeping well. Friday night my wife kept me up most of the night. She gets up every couple hours to pee, plus she had a sore throat so she needed medicine and water a couple times and then when she was sleeping she was snoring like a freight train. So needless to say I didn't really sleep. I starting thinking to myself how silly it was that I was frustrated and I really had absolutely no reason to be. I used to have a pretty bad temper and nothing really made me happy. I guess I still fall back into that every once in a while but its getting to be less and less. I know I still have a lot of work to do but I'm glad that there is progress.

So this is technically the first Mother's Day for my wife, since she's 21 weeks pregnant, but she had to work. So next weekend we're going to spend a night in a nice hotel and go to Sunday brunch in the morning. Its only a couple miles away but it will still be like a little vacation. I know it will make her happy and that in turn makes me happy. It used to be that if something wasn't what I wanted then it did nothing for me. Now I'm seeing that doing things for other people, especially family, is what gives me the most enjoyment. It isn't the actual activity that is done but its the knowing that it makes them happy.

I don't know if much of this makes sense but its how I see things.